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Shouldn't This Have Been My New Year's Post??

I've got this terrible little habit that pops up from time to time, of doing things, or more especially NOT doing things, that I should or even want to accomplish. I don't know if its out of laziness or lack of motivation but I just have a hard time being "self-destructive" of my own goals.

For example:
-I cannot make myself get out of bed before 7:10 in the morning anymore. Even when I'm not tired, I still refuse to get up. Reverting back to my childish ways of being a morning hating 5 year old, I guess. Not to mention this make me 10 min late to work every day. And this morning, it was 7:25...ridiculous.
-I have been eating a lot of CRAP the last couple of weeks. And I don't even want to eat it and it makes me feel fat and bloaty and just down right terrible, but I just keep eating and eating and eating...
-I have not stepped on my stairmaster for 6 days... that's more days in a week I've missed than in an entire month before now. Granted I've been sick with a sinus cold, but even before that, I've been struggling to FORCE myself to workout for a measly 35 minutes a day. Down right throwing a fit about it when I do have to do it. Poor J is trying to help me with this one but I act like a total b*tch when he says anything to me about it...
-(Before I chopped my hair off yesterday) I stopped fixing my hair, kept putting it up in a low bun/ponytail while my hair was still wet even! Not one of those cute, "bump it" low ponys either... And I care less and less about my work attire too. I just throw on the first outfit that sort of matches. This one, though, probably has a lot to do with the first point of not wanting to get out of bed on time and then, therefore, not having enough time to get myself ready.
-I waste entirely TOO much time at work. I spend my day surfing the net, facebook stalking, and blogging. When I get bored with that, I go chat with a friend of mine or I eat something (see first point). Its getting ridiculous and I do admit that I'm not liking my job/career right now, but its no excuse. I should still be working hard.
-I have to force myself to pickup the house/do laundry and I hate it when the house is messy. I may not have ever been the best house cleaner but my house is always picked up and tidied and laundry is always done...folding is a different story. BUT now, I don't even care if there are dirty socks on the floor and dishes with food still on them in the sink! Ew. Well, ok, I do CARE but I don't do anything about it.

Ugh!

This is not the person I want to be. I have the want and desire to work out and get up early and lose a few pounds and do well at my job and look cute and my house to always be clean. I am just really having a hard time finding the motivation to actually do these things. Its like I have to force myself to do it and my lazy side always wins out in the argument. How can you want something so bad but not DO it when the time comes. Especially when these are EASY things to do?!?!??

I'm all about instant gratification. If I don't get my way right away, I get ticked and don't want to do it anymore... I guess this is what I'm struggling with. So, I'm making some personal goals this week:

1. Wake up at 6:30 every morning. NO SNOOZE BUTTON.
2. No facebook at work, not even at lunch. And blogger only at lunch to update on my goal(s) status.
3. DIET - not a strict one but NO snacks in between meals and much smaller portions. Much, much smaller.
4. 35 minutes on the stairmaster every night as soon as I get home from work. If I have plans after work, then have to do the stairmaster in the a.m. Any other working out is optional but this is mandatory.
5. As soon as I get done on the stairmaster, house work for another 30 min. My poor house is in dire need.

So, these are my goals that I want to accomplish. Not putting a weight I want to lose or how much house work I want to get done or a strict limit on the foods I eat. There's more things I would like to change but this is a good start. I'm hoping by putting these out on my blog, I'll feel a little more accountable for these things if I have to admit to someone when I screw up. And, I'll start with a goal of a week straight to start with and if I make it a week straight I'll try two weeks straight, then a month, and so on. And maybe I'll add in a couple new things. This is boring and dumb for anyone who's reading this I'm sure, but its my blog and I can bore you with dumb crap if I want to. :)

Comments

Anonymous said…
Not boring....not dumb......totally great idea.

Unfortunately, you inheireted this from your mother. :(
Goldie said…
Yeah but I got a lot of other GREAT things from my mother, so it was worth the trade ;)
Anonymous said…
So glad to hear that!

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