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About This Time Last Year

B and I were in the midst of our "relationship". I use that word loosely cause I don't know what the hell we were. He had just gotten back from Vegas with a friend of his for Superbowl and had just told me that he officially wanted to start dating (while drunk in Vegas - shoulda been my first clue). Cue big cheeser and a happy dance. I was so excited! Then he gets back from Vegas and....nothing. We're back with the no talking/I'm gonna avoid you like the plague thing. Still, I think, he said he wants to start dating?! Valentine's Day was coming up. I wanted to do something cool for him. You know, in case he decided to do something for me. So, he had mentioned that he smoked his first cigar while he was in Vegas and LOVED it. So, I go to a cigar shop and buy him three or four pretty nice cigars and feel like the C.O.O.L.E.S.T. girlfriend on the planet. I mean, come on...it was a genius idea. So the closer we get to Valentine's Day, the less we speak and for the 5 or 6 days before, we don't talk at all. Then I send him a text and ask what he's doing for Valentine's Day. He says nothing, he has the kids. Like I'm some kind of dummy for expecting we would do something. Or even see each other. *Slaps hand to forehead* I fell for it again. So, the day after Valentine's Day, I'm sitting like a stupid sap at my apartment, heart wrenching, with these stupid ass cigars in my hand and I text him and confess that I got him something and that I'm bringing it over. Mind you this took lots and lots of big-girl-panties and guts to do this because we have never again discussed his confession of wanting coupledom and he's been not speaking to me. So I take him his coolest valentine's gift ever and he gives me some of his kids' leftover v-day candy. We hug. I leave.

It was a rough Valentine's Day I tell you. And around Super Bowl this year, I couldn't help but think of him and us and this time last year and how this would have been our one year this year. And he went to Vegas with his friend over that weekend again. Lots of memories were resurfaced. I guess I wasn't the only one having them resurface because after months and months, last Sunday night after the Superbowl, I got this text:

I am smoking your cigars right now. I really miss you by the way and it tears at me walking by you every day now. :(

Made my heart stop and I'm pretty sure the color went out of my face (I hate that he still does that to me btw). I was totally shocked and the timing was so weird. I really do miss him too but I don't miss our "relationship" at all.

Remembering times like these makes me all that more thankful that I have J and how amazing of a boyfriend he truly is.

Comments

Anonymous said…
NO WAY!!!!!
February 11, 2010 at 3:06 PM
Dawn Allen said…
I can't make this stuff up...
February 12, 2010 at 10:07 AM
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